Self-care and connection. This is what my birthday was all about.
For many years, actually most of my life I didn't really celebrate my birthday, and rather treated it like any other day, hoping that no one would remember it or make a fuss. It was never the case no matter how hard I tried to hide. Others seemed to celebrate around me, while I hid deep within. The beauty is when I started reconnecting with my true essence. It felt like I started blossoming and was ready to celebrate who I truly am in the moment. My birthday has become something magickal to celebrate with love and gratitude.
So, my solar return was on Saturday (23 January) and I spent the morning in the forest with my family to connect with Gaia, honour her and connect with the pure living waters of the mountain. Since I've connected with Mary Magdalene my remembrance of water and its healing power has become much clearer. Water's memory is helping me to start remembering who I am and why I'm here. I came across information about Dr Masaru Emoto's research on water crystals and emotions many years ago, but only recently when I watch The Secret of Water (a documentary) did the light bulb go on. Almost immediately thereafter the Mary Magdalene School shared information on their Facebook page (or in one of their Facebook groups) on activating water and I first started experimenting by taking filtered water from the tap and pouring it with love and gratitude into an 8l glass canister and placing rose quartz crystals around it. Every time I walked past it; I would send these thoughts to the water: "Thank you" and "I love you". When I drank this water it had a softer, gentler taste/nature. But only when I stopped using it and started using the water directly from the filter water tap did I really notice that my body was craving the water that was in the glass canister with the crystals. According to my understanding the water from the canister had absorbed the love and gratitude I was sending it, as well as the energy of the rose quartz crystals, which helps me to open my Heart Chakra. This also demonstrated how powerful our thoughts are. Not once did I speak the words out loud towards the water. They were simply thoughts. Our bodies mainly consist of water. Can you imagine what our thoughts do to our bodies? This reinforces the power of self-love. Working on letting go of the limiting beliefs by facing each challenge, and facing these limiting beliefs head-on has helped me tremendously thus far.
Back to my adventure in Hogsback... We then ventured to the local market to connect with the locals, which was awesome. I was listening to people's journeys and watching them glow as they spoke about their passions. This experience showed me how much I'd grown. Before I was hiding and now, I absolutely loved interacting with everyone and celebrating their achievements with them. And best of all, my mood was not dependent on their reactions toward me. I know who I am and that makes a HUGE difference. There is no longer a need to fit in. I've accepted that I am different and that is one of my gifts. I am not meant to blend into the crowd. And an added bonus was getting locally made wild mushroom pickle. It was AMAZING! Made with mushrooms from the forest, olive oil and apple cider vinegar and no gunk in it. My kinda world.
I also enjoyed lots of quiet time, allowing time for reflection and a deep connection within. As a child this is where I spent most of my life (being in the spiritual realms), but being more embodied has helped me to find more balance between the spiritual realm and the earthly plane. It has allowed me to not escape to the spiritual realms, but instead embrace being on earth and enjoy being human while using my connection to the spiritual realm to connect to my guidance and simply be while allowing space for guidance to come through if and when needed.
I ended the day standing on The Edge (edge of the mountain overlooking a valley) and fears started bubbling up. Things that never troubled me before. E.g., I've always loved heights (anything adrenaline pumping excites me and makes me feel alive). But while standing at The Edge the fear escalated and others started bubbling up as well. Instead of trying to convince myself that I am safe, I accepted everything that presented itself. Allowing everything that surfaced enough time and space before going back to the cottage that we stayed in.
Then last night, as I settled down in bed, more clarity came through, which allowed me to reinforce that I am not a victim. I, like many of us, had lived many lives and took on many different roles. Sometimes we were victims and other times we were perpetrators. There is no need to judge these as good or bad. It is what it is. It was needed to get me to where I am now. And I am grateful for each and every single experience.
The things that bubbled to the surface were simply things that I was ready to let go of. Accepting everything with all of its shadow aspects has helped me to accept another part of me that I tried to hide and disconnect from.
So, I had an awesome, magickal birthday! And I am so blessed to have spent it with my beautiful family in one of our favourite places with lots of accepting, embracing, letting go and embodying. I am extremely grateful to the Universe (Mother/Father God) and all the beings that made this day so special
I love you all!
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